Don’t Sweat The Small Stuff

I was amused to see this(Don’t Sweat The Small Stuff’ as an important piece of advice in Tric Kearney’s blog the other day and when I thought about it, I realised that my motto ‘tomorrow is another day’ isn’t a million miles away. I’m usually of the opinion that very few things are so important that they have to be done today, yes, there are deadlines with some things but if the hoover isn’t run around till tomorrow or the bathroom isn’t cleaned or the washing isn’t ironed, there’s no panic at all.

Before farming and children, I was reasonably house proud but it was easy then – we lived in two and three bedroom Victorian mid terraced houses – 6 rooms in total, reasonable sized garden but very manageable, no wellies, no lego. As we usually spent half the time (ie one year of the two we’d stay living in each house) renovating, the houses didn’t have to be kept tidy and dust free for all that long before I was on to the next dusty project. ?Paid work was then confined to 8:30-5ish, it rarely came home with me. I stayed at the school after classes had finished to get marking and prep work done and then left it all there.

Pitch and Foot

Pitch and Foot

Anyone who comes to my back door now would fall over about three pairs of wellies, two pairs of runners, swingball racquets, a football and probably a tennis racquet just to take the two steps to get into the scullery – and that’s not counting the old farm tom cat that has taken to hanging out around the back door too. If they made it to the living room, they would probably mistake it for a playroom as at one side there’s some Sylvanian doll’s houses set up on raised coffee tables plus some Lego friends, at the other side there’s a considerably sized Lego city laid out. On the rug in front of the fire, we have a tub contained oddments of lego and a variety of houses at various building stages. Plonked in the middle of all those are the sofa and two armchairs. Oh, and I forgot the iron that is on the floor from being used to hastily iron something yesterday morning. Brian does sometimes wonder aloud if I am teaching the kids bad habits ie not being tidy enough but I feel the opposite is just as bad – ie not being able to relax if something is out of place and I have seen people like that and I didn’t think they looked terribly happy- well, that’s my excuse! I always think if you can ignore the washing up to sit down and enjoy a book – that’s relaxation.

Retrieving a football!!

Retrieving a football!!

There are 3 buckets of exterior paint in the scullery, there’s varnish for the window and there’s a huge bucket of creosote. Yes, I have plans to paint all of the windows this summer (have given three one coat of paint – there’s 13 of assorted sizes on the ground floor and five on the first floor! I also have plans to paint the outside of the house and creosote the fencing. Brian had plans to repair a shed roof while there is still lots of dung piled up in the shed (so that if he falls through, he has a soft landing! – yep, a 45 year old farmer fell ten feet through a shed roof to a concrete floor two weeks ago and died very shortly afterwards).

I had plans to paint a couple of windows today – after I’d sorted blog awards stuff, written a couple of ghost posts for clients, maybe even written a post here but what did Brian suggest yesterday but a trip to the beach. We were all feeling subdued on Tuesday – not sure if it was because it was the bank holiday blues or the realisation that these long summer holidays are going to be over in just 3 weeks. Now, I know that some parents only get to spend two weeks away on hols with their kids, I know I’m lucky to be able to work while they are around but 6 weeks of the holidays are gone already – 6 weeks is all the UK kids get poor things and there’s only 3 weeks left.

Added to this is the fact that our eldest is going into his final year in primary school, it’s 8 years since he started – where have those years gone?! Another 8 years and both of them will be in university, independent, going on their own holidays, making their own fun, going out with boyfriends/girlfriends, blessing us with their presence occasionally.

So we headed off to play ‘Pitch and Foot’ today, a 10 hold course with a par of 39!! Good fun, then for a pub lunch and then to the beach and a wander along a coast path before heading home to do the rest of the work. Fabulously hot day until we got to Kilkenny and the heavens opened.

Dunmore East Coast Path

Dunmore East Coast Path

We’ve had more days out this summer than usual – we’ve managed a day away as a family most weeks (in addition to an afternoon off on Sundays) and even had two one-night stays away too. But we decided – sod the painting and the shed, it can be done tomorrow or the day after. As I pointed out, we were both up and working by 6:30, we left at 11:30 – that’s a good 4.5 hours work done on our ‘day off’ not to mention the evening milking and the fact that I’ll tap away on the keyboard too.

So if you come to my house and you fall over wellies or an iron or wonder if you should sweep the floor for me (please do!) please remember that I was probably on a day out the day before and decided that tidy houses are overrated!

Because as Tric’s blog post reminds us, we never know what is around the corner. We don’t all live till we are in our 80s. Accidents happen (2 young children died in farm accidents last weekend – God love their families because it doesn’t bear thinking about) and people get life threatening illnesses. Children die. Young parents die.

‘Tomorrow is another day’ and ‘Don’t sweat the small stuff’ – two important mottos for life that I hope my children will live by too.

6 thoughts on “Don’t Sweat The Small Stuff

  • M T McGuire

    At a time when I’ve been slightly wondering if 10% of the human race is about to get wiped out by ebola (things are going so well for me that I can’t believe it’ll last without something stuffing it up) that’s a heartening post to read.

    Cheers

    MTM

    Reply
    • Lorna

      Yep, ebola is getting serious alright! At least they are treating it more seriously now though. Given that I’m tied to Ireland at the moment though, I should probably worry more about my windows falling in if I don’t paint them soon!

      Reply
  • Mary MacPhee

    Hi ,
    I have been following you on Facebook for a while. I like your postings and I really like this article. I live in Cape Breton on a dairy farm , have three adult children , work on the farm, was a teacher before I married my farmer 27 years ago,so I know about most of the things that you write about. I agree about the house work . The thing about farm houses is that we live in them ,unlike people who go off to work every day. Your house sounds like mine was when my kids were growing up. It is neater now that my girls live elsewhere, and I have more time to keep it neat. My son works on the farm so that frees me up to do other things. I always thought it was more important to do things with the kids and my husband , and looking back ,I am glad that I did. Enjoy your kids when they are young. There will be time to clean up after they have gone off to do their own thing. Like you said, don’t sweat the small stuff.
    Mary

    Reply
    • Lorna

      thanks for your lovely comment Mary. I don’t know if you saw my ‘perfect wife post’ a few weeks ago when I admitted to failing at polishing my lightbulbs. Indeed, I only replaced some in the living room the other day for the first time in ages. Brian came in last night and said ‘great, we have light, we can see the dust now!’ooops!

      Reply
  • tric

    Thanks so much for the mention Lorna. I am delighted. Young Daniel dying has changed all of us who knew him forever, but not necessarily all that is negative. This advice, I think, will actually make my life and those around me even better.
    I used to think Summer was wonderful when the kids were young but it was hard work then, reading your post reminded me how much fun you can have with older children,who are still and always will be. our children. I am glad you are getting time out to enjoy them in the midst of a busy life.

    Reply
    • Lorna

      It’s easy to look back and wish time had stopped in a way. We have a huge sandpit in the back garden and the kids used to spend hours and hours playing in it. My husband said recently that he must take down the boards and get rid of the sand. I was delighted one day to see the two kids digging in it, it didn’t entertain them for that long but was good to see – nostalgia!
      I agree, what you do with them change as they grow but it’s always just as good.

      Reply

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