Friday seems to be a good day to share some “farmologies” with you, (the first five are in this previous post) those things that seem to happen on farms and probably don’t happen anywhere else. I’m reasonably confident though that these farmologies happen on farms all over the world, not just in my tiny corner of Ireland.
When you have small children walking across a field with you, at least one of them is bound to find the muddiest part of the field, and not splash, oh no, that would be too easy, he or she will cry out that their foot is stuck. They make a colossal effort to pull out their foot, the foot comes out and lands in a muddy water but the welly stays stuck.
I can remember getting well and truly stuck when I was about 8 years old and bringing in the cows. The weather was awful and of course, I chose the muddiest part of the field to walk across. Both feet were firmly stuck in about 8 inches of mud and my dad had to come over and yank my wellies out one at a time.
The day before you do a big grocery shopping and the cupboards are looking bare, is the day that a couple of contractors arrive unexpectedly to finish off some work and you’ve to cook them dinner.
I try to convince myself that if I give them decent dinners when I do know they are coming, that they will forgive the occasional “threw it all together in 10 minutes” dinner. For me, it’s omelette – as long as I have eggs, an onion and either rashers or mushrooms, it will be fine. Served with peas (always have a bag of frozen peas in the freezer, hardly ever use them but great for a quick emergency “must cook it now and there’s no other veg” dinner) and of course, potatoes in some shape or form.
The one time you decide to not put a gate or wire in place when moving livestock, one will notice and they will all follow that individual in going exactly where you don’t want them to go. The ten minute job of moving them turns into forty minutes of running around and persuading them to go back, not to mention the swearing and shouting.
The fox kills some of your hens but not the one that only lays an egg once a week, or the one that you suspect is eating eggs either.
On the day the farmer plans to return all of those items borrowed from the house, the owner of the items finds them – in the barn, shed, milking parlour, dog’s kennel, calf house …..
I hope you have a good weekend. My article for Farmers Weekly on farmers’ role in sex education, making signature bakes, providing local gossip and entertainment has been published if you’d like to pop over for a read.